I have come to terms with the fact that there are two very distinct sides of my personality. One the one hand I am a relentless business woman who loves analyzing, creating and implementing business plans, fixing problems, overcoming challenges, public speaking, building and supporting teams and in general just moving and completing tasks at a very fast pace. Also known as my driven side. Then there is the motherly, yet clumsy, side where I care deeply about family and supporting my children, giving them the tools to be successful in this world. That side is loving, caring, fun, silly, childlike yet responsible. The artistic side of me is there too, where I am fun and carefree, love music and food and want the world to be a better place. These seem like almost two different very women, but over the years I have sewn them together along the seam to try and be all things. The problem with that has been no one can be all things and I bust a thread from time to time, repair the damage and move on. Not working any longer has integrated these things far more than they ever have been in the past. I am driven to do a good job raising my kids, treat the household like a business and search for better opportunities that mesh well with my family life. However I am still navigating my way around those things how and where to stand firm, how to better be supportive without suffocating How can I teach my kids about the world without distorting their viewpoint to my own. These are all challenges that I now have the time to face, and hopefully will make good decisions. This blog allows me to write things out which can at times help me gain perspective, even when it is writing mostly about food. Certainly I will make mistakes, and I hope in all things I can keep my sense of humor in tact. I have worked hard since I was 14 years old, and up until this year, always thought of myself as balancing both. I never thought “work” would be my identity, and I still do not think that it was, but the grooves of professional woman run deep. While I do not want to change that about myself, I want these two sides to merge more seamlessly, each side of me has things to learn from the other. In the meantime I am infinitely lucky to have this time with my family, strengthening our bond and investing in our future.
This sounds a little crazy I admit, but such is life. ~Enjoy!
Picture from a road trip in 2010, they grow up so fast.